Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 95

Contest No. 95 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save". Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission.

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions for this contest is midnight Tuesday, January 19, 2016.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your caption.


"No can do. The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain."

"We do not pay for any damages caused by our rainmakers."

Well before this I was OF counsel attorney, but the firm went bust!

Would you like the Relief, Frontal or Convectional Rainfall Package.

A little singing, a little dancing, we make it happen.

"Sorry kid, we don't do snow days."

No, we can't make it rain just over your mother-in-law's house.

1."No, we cannot make your Apple Cloud burst."

2. "I think we'll pass on your jingle suggestion for our company...'Rain, rain, go away, come again another day.'"

3."Boss, it's Macy's. They said, 'Don't rain on my parade.'"

4."Hail and sleet will cost you an extra $2000."

5. "We have a special today...three claps of thunder for the price of one

My ex-husband is putting a roof on his new house in a few days. Can you have a hurricane at his house tomorrow?

It is nice to hear from you, Lawrence of Arabia. I'm sorry you are thirsty, but we don't fly to the Sahara Desert.

Thanks for holding -- we've been flooded with calls.

We're good to the last drop.

Ok. Look for it sometime between 8 and 2.

Problem, boss: our rain in Spain stayed mainly in the plane.

I run a ski run. I know it's July but could you create snow?

"Sorry, as an equal opportunity rainfall company,we cannot allow the customer to choose who or who does not receive our rainfall."

"Yup, the 1986 Mets, Red Socks World Series rain delay...that was us."

Sorry. I know you manufactures umbrellas, but it's not ethical for me to create a storm to help your business.

Captain, it rained but just for 2 minutes. I want 80% of my money back

God, don't be angry at us. All we cause is a little rain. You still are the guy who causes hurricanes and tornadoes.

"Rainmakers, serving umbrella manufacturers for twenty five years."

"Business is lousy. We've been closed every day on account of rain."

"Really? You're the first amusement park that's called for our services!"

"Actually, we don't have any planes. We just pray real hard."

"Your petunias? I suggest you just pick up a watering can at your local hardware store?"

"Sorry, we don't offer any rain dates."

I wear this Captain's hat so people will think I'm important.

I'm sorry that you lost your crops because they over-soaked. My pilot was drunk that day.

We only fly to places where it normally rains every day.

We can't have it rain just because you want to clean your sidewalk.

We don't use planes- we use the finest African Witch Doctors.

1. "Yes mom, I promise to wear my galoshes."

2. "Your lawn? I think we would be a little overkill."

3. "No, we don't do acid rain...and by the way, that's not a hallucinogenic downpour."

4. " You want an example of our work? Have you ever seen the Great Lakes. They were a desert before we got on site."

5. "We leave 40 days and 40 nights for a Higher Power."

The sign that you made for me is wrong. It should say "You pay even if we fail."

No,this Rainman isn`t called Dustin Hoffman.

Mom, my psychiatrist gave me the desk, the telephone , the sign, and my hat and jacket. He said I'd be happy if I believed that I had an important job.

1. "I'm sorry, we don't offer any rain dates."

2. "Forty days and forty nights? We haven't had a request for that in a looooong time."

3. "Are we good?" Before us, the 'The Rain Forrest' was just called 'The Forrest.'"

4. "That's an order for forty days and nights, starting next Tuesday. We suggest you start building an arc as soon as you hang up."

5. "If it rains before we come, we'll give you a rain date.

6. "You want, 'My husband is a lazy bum?' I think you want Skywriters, Inc."

7. "We offer lower rates if you provide your own clouds."

8. "Hold your water. The earliest appointment I can give you is in three months."

9. "Oh, our liquid assets are just fine."

10. "Well doc, ever since I took this new job, I've been getting up four or five times each night to go to the bathroom."

Sorry, I can't guarantee that we can have a cloud just send rain on your 5 foot by 3 foot garden.

" Sorry to inform you that we are being forced out of business by a higher authority."

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