Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 80

Contest No. 80 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save". Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission.

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions for this contest is midnight Tuesday, March 3, 2015.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your caption.


"Do you remember exercise and fresh air, or shall I Google them for you?"

"Your monitor is as old as the Merrimack."

"Will you be joining us for supper, or dining in the Cloud?"

A Limerick:

"You spend hours in here on your butt
Surfing for gosh knows what,
You need to get a life
Back with me your wife,
And out of your cyber rut."

The Pest Controller is on his way,that Mouse has to go.

Turn that off or I`ll delete our love life

You're taking "pushing my buttons" to a whole new level, Herb.

I've been standing here for 18 hours waiting to use the computer!!!

Which frame are you referring to in that email as too big? Mine or the door?

" . . He moved out two years ago! . . . and anyway, nobody uses dial phones to call people anymore !"

"That's not what I meant by emptying the trash!"

"Are you planning to honor us with your company for supper, or should I just roll in the Intravenous IV ?"

1. "I assume all this time your spending on the computer is revenge for all the times I said, 'Not tonight, I have a headache.'"

2. "Your soup is getting cold and so is our sex life."

3. "I never thought I'd say this, but I long for the good old days when you sat in front of the TV all night."

"Yes lunch is ready, but I'm not your dedicated server."

"If you can possibly tear yourself away from whatever mindless drivel you're watching, I need to check my own mindless drivel."

It's your blog or me.

I didn't say I missed googling together, I said I missed GIGGLING together.

"Well this is code for, get off that computer or you'll be sleeping in that chair tonight!"

"How about if one of us works away from home?"

"We need this room, why don't you buy a Tablet and find a coffee shop?"

"We're done banking online. That computer is slower than the lines at the bank."

"Don't let me catch you chatting in chat rooms without your wedding ring on."

"You never visit my parents website."

Okay Jack, you finally discovered my secret that I spend my time on the computer looking at erotic websites.

1. "It's the same old story since Adam and Eve. The Apple ruins another marriage."

2. "Now that your so good at it...go clean our windows."

3. "Looks like you got the Apple and I got the worm."

"Ever since you discovered AOL you've been AWOL from your family."

"I'll just be a second printing my itinerary 'cause it's just one-way."

"The Smithsonian called, they offered to pick up the monitor."

"Should I email you when dinner's ready?"

"I just received our bank statement: seems you've become very good friends with Amazon, eBay, and HSN."

I am sorry that you saw my photo on "Married Women Looking For Sexy Men"

I am so upset that you spend all your time on the computer that I forgot that we were supposed to go to our daughters wedding an hour ago..

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