Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 73

Contest No. 73 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save". Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission.

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions for this contest is midnight Tuesday, September 23, 2014.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your caption. I'm hoping you'll all come up with some really funny ones this time -- please don't disappoint me.



Sweetheart, I just got the book I ordered from Amazon "How To Murder Husbands Who Spend All Their Time Watching Sports On TV"

Oh look dear, it's that "Thousand and One Ways to Have Fun on Sunday" kit that I ordered you!

They say you may already be a winner - those liars.

1. "Your Viagra pills arrived. Turn off the TV."

2. "It's from some Nigerian Prince and it feels like a lot of money."

3. "Harry, your 'Beef Jerky of the Month' box is here."

4. "Ralph, did you order broken glass?"

5. "Uncle Sam wants you. Calm down, it's just your uncle Sam Schwartz."

6. "Great, the 'Divorce for Dummies' book arrived."

"I just got my own TV remote. So much for your uninterrupted football Sundays."

"Arnold, my exercise book has arrived: 'How to Get A Tight End.'"

"It's my boxed set of Jane Austen movies!"

1." It's our daughter's wedding invitations. Will you be coming?

2."My book arrived: 'How To Get The Man Out Of Man Cave.'"


Josephine, don't tell me you just bought another book about 18th century philosophy so you can waste your time?

"We won a round-the-world cruise that starts next week!"

1. "Harry, did you order a steak? There's something here from Amazon Prime."

2. Circa 2050: "Ed, you gotta come see this. It's something called a book."

John, it finally arrived- a device to cut out all TV sports games.

" This must be for you. It says 'Fragile,' just like your ego."

It finally arrived- my divorce papers.

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