Insurance Sales, 1981





Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 165


                                           "Can we visit 2019?"

                                                 (by Kelasher)

 

My original caption: "The problem is I'm going on an ego trip and he's going on a guilt trip."

 

Hearty congratulations, Kelasher, on your big victory (win number twelve, according to my calculations). Once again, you have proven to the world that you are indeed one of the funniest people around.

These are the other captions that, in my humble opinion, merited serious consideration for top honors:

"Would you consider giving my husband a 'partial refund' . . . for the distance he had to swim back to shore?" (by Kay Ralph)

"We'd like to go somewhere more relaxing, like the tip of an active volcano." (by Marc Eliot Stein)

"Do you have any vacations that don't require leaving our house?" (by Jonathan Stein)

"Oh no, don't bother with the cruise cancellation insurance he said. What could possibly go wrong he said." (by Ronn Roxx)

"Does a singles cruise to Cancun meet the minimum guidelines for social distancing from my husband?" (by Charles Vaughan)

"Stop pushing your romantic destinations . . . we've been married for 35 years." (by Cary Antebi)

"He's only going to be happy if you can offer him a time travel package away from the year 2020." (by Gary)

 

There'll be a new contest popping up in just a few short weeks. Keep up the good work, Captioneers!




Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 165


Contest No. 165 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. You will also be asked to verify that you are a human being and not a robot. Please follow the instructions in the "Captcha" box. Then (3) click "Save".

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. However, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else's similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Tuesday, September 22, 2020.   

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.

 




Bureau of Business Practice, 1989





National Examiner, December 31, 1991





Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 164


"In other news, spontaneous rigor mortis continues to plague the tri-state area."

                                                (by Rich Wolf)

 

My original caption: "ATTENTION, TAX CHEATERS . . . !"

 

Good work, Rich Wolf -- this is your eighth win, and you can once again bask in the glory of being one of the funniest people around. Congratulations!

Lots of election captions this time, and of course a few on the pandemic. Unfortunately, none of them made it to the top.

Here are the other captions that almost made the grade:

" . . . and that's tonight's news. We tell it like it is, so you can sit back and relax!" (by Brendan Gannon)

"We know little about the corona virus but doctors are now saying you can catch it from your local anchor man." (by Cary Antebi)

"Give it a try . . . the newest craze . . . 'Planking for seniors'!" (by Kay Ralph)

"A relaxation exercise for these difficult times: tense up, tense up, tense up . . . good! Now relax. I said, relax. Are you okay, sir? (by Sharon)

"Coming up, signs that you may be getting too much iron." (by Keith Huie)

 

A new contest will be up in a few short weeks -- thanks for keeping those captions coming!

 

 

 




Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 164


Contest No. 164 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. You will also be asked to verify that you are a human being and not a robot. Please follow the instructions in the "Captcha" box. Then (3) click "Save".

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. However, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else's similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Tuesday, August 25, 2020.   

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.

 




Dartnell, April 17, 1989





West Coast Review of Books, 1980





Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 163


"What about kids rights? They have the umbrella, beach chairs, and a blanket. We have the hot sun and sticky sand."

                                                   (by Carole)

 

My original caption: "Do you know of any creative, state-of-the-art innovations in sand technology?"

 

Congratulations, first-time winner Carole! You now have bragging rights galore, because you're officially one of the funniest people around!

 

Here are the other captions that I was seriously considering for top honors:

"Six feet buddy . . . I don't like the look of that rash on your pail!" (by Kay Ralph)

"Do you think there is a future in building sand castles?" (by Diane)

"How much more do we need to start our own sandblasting business?" (by Mary Rogers)

"Location, location, location." (by Sagie Tvizer)

"Don't dig too deep. You could end up getting the China flu!" (by Ronn Roxx)

"Thanks for helping with my parents. Next up: Let's bury yours." (by Dennis Bills)

 

A new contest will be here before you know it, Captioneers. Keep up the good work . . . and thanks for participating.

 

                                              

                                     




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