Bureau of Business Practice, 1998





Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 120


"Well, it's been ten years now . . . what do you say we rearrange the furniture?"

                                             (by Cary Antebi)

                "I was thinking about re-arranging the furniture today!"

                                             (by Tim Collins)

 

My original caption: "The maximum penalty the law allowed? Wow, that's impressive!"

Yes, it's a tie, so congratulations Cary Antebi and Tim Collins for your very similar captions. You've both earned the "one of the funniest people around" title before . . . this is the twenty-eighth time for Cary and the third time for Tim.

I have to admit that I was that close to giving myself the title this time around, because, once again, I felt that my original caption was much funnier than any of the captions submitted. 

And speaking of all the captions submitted, it looks like I'll have to impose a limit on the number of captions any individual can enter into each contest, and the number will probably be 15. After all, if you can't make a funny statement in 15 attempts, maybe you should should wait for the next drawing.

Here are the other captions that I was considering:

"So I says, 'Your honor, who died and made you Judge'?" (also by Tim Collins)

"Have you seen "The Shawshank Redemption'?" (by Segie Tvizer)

"Let's be adventurous and do something different today . . . you sit and I'll lie." (also by Cary Antebi)

The new contest should be up in a couple of weeks. Thanks for competing!

 




Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 120


Contest No. 120 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save".

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. Also, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest.  This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else's similar spontaneous caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Tuesday, July 4, 2017.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.




Creative Computing, 1982





Insurance Sales, February 1989





Machine Design, 1992





Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 119


                "Honey, I need a new electric shaver -- this one is broken."

                                           (by ken wilkinson)

 

My original caption: "Sorry -- you have the wrong generation." 

 

Wow, ken wilkinson, this makes two winners in a row! Congratulations again -- without a doubt you are one of the funniest people around.

There was a big quantity of captions from all of you this time, but what in the world happened to the quality? As I was making my final run through the submissions, I could barely find any to even consider for a winner. Dare I say it once again? In my humble opinion, I think my original caption, as bad as it was (it must have been bad, because it was never bought) was probably better than most of the entries. Let's all of us try to take it up a notch, okay?

Anyway, here are the other captions that were under consideration for top honors:

"What time do you eat dinner? I'll call you back." (by Susan Canaan)

"Yes, I'm Harry Meismendelfalinfeffersolakofsky . . . but you have the wrong number." (by Cary Antebi)

"I'm calling on my land-line phone, I don't have Wi-Fi, Bluetooth or Skype, and ...I don't even know what I'm talking about!" (also by Cary Antebi)

"So, what are you wearing?" (by Mel Tannenbaum)

"911? Yes, it's an emergency! I'm stuck in the past." (by sharon)

Sharpen those caption-writing pencils, folks -- a new contest will be up in just a couple of weeks. And don't get discouraged -- remember it's all supposed to be fun!

 

 

 




Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 119


Contest No. 119 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save".

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. Also, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest.  This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else's similar spontaneous caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Tuesday, June 13, 2017.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.




Report to Legal Management, 1996





"We All Have To Start Somewhere Department". Case in Point No. 19


Case in point Number 19 in this very irregular feature is . . . me.

In 1946, at the age of 14, I sent a letter to cartoonist Stan MacGovern at the New York Post. The Post in the 1940's was New York City's politically-liberal newspaper, owned and published by Dorothy Schiff, and it had a huge circulation all over town. That's just the opposite of what the Post is today, under the ownership of Australian Rupert Murdoch.

Anyway, one of the Post's exclusive comics at that time was Stan MacGovern's daily and weekend strip "Silly Milly", which ran the humor gamut from the ridiculous to the sublime. MacGovern had many "Departments", and in my note to him I suggested an idea for one of his running gags. In my exhuberance, I even sent him a drawing of the gag so he could see how it could work. 

The next thing I knew, the letter, the drawing and my gag appeared in a Silly Milly weekend strip and MacGovern built the rest of that day's strip around it. Here it is, and I guess I should mention at this point that Eli is my middle name and Isidore is my first name!  

Of course, I was delighted to see the strip and, as they say, the rest is history. So thank you, Stan MacGovern, wherever you are.

I usually finish my "We All Have To Start Somewhere Department" with a photo of the cartoonist, so here's one of me at age 14, give or take a year or two.




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