The Chronicle of Higher Education, September 13, 1989





Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 73


It's another tie!

 

                        "Great, the 'Divorce for Dummies' book arrived."

                                               (by Cary Antebi)

                                "It finally arrived -- my divorce papers." 

                                            (by Howard Garrett)

 

My original caption: "Oh, good -- my do-it-yourself divorce kit!" (And, on an older version of the cartoon, my caption was "Just the usual stuff in the mail, dear . . . bills . . . coupons . . . my do-it-yourself divorce kit . . . "). Neither the longer version nor the shorter one was ever bought or published.

 

Congratulations, you two. This is your seventeenth win, Cary Antebi, and your third one, Howard Garrett. So I'll just say it again for all to hear -- you've got to be two of the funniest people around!

Here are the other captions that I was seriously considering for top honors:

"They say you may already be a winner -- those liars." (by Dale Stout)

"'CELEBRATE 'OUR' WINNINGS FROM BETTING!' The newest IRS pamphlet!" (by drmrs)

Don't despair -- a new contest will be coming up soon.

 




Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 73


Contest No. 73 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save". Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission.

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions for this contest is midnight Tuesday, September 23, 2014.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your caption. I'm hoping you'll all come up with some really funny ones this time -- please don't disappoint me.

 




Globe, 1988





Official Detective, 1990





Dartnell, 1998





Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 72


                     "I know the nurse, but who the hell are you two?"

                                         (by Howard Garrett)

 

My original caption: "My only regret is that I never had anything to blab to the tabloids."

 

My heartfelt congratulations, Howard Garrett! This is your second win, and once again you can bask in the glory of being "One of the Funniest People Around".

There were lots of good captions submitted, and quite a few, I thought, were funnier than my rather tame original caption. Here are the ones that almost made it:

"Stop standing there and do something to get me out of here!" (by Anne Noonan)

"Who's standing on my catheter?" (by Dale Stout)

"Can we just take one last selfie?" (by Levi)

"It was the damn ED pill!" (by Joe Flynn) [ED=Erectile Dysfunction]

"Get the hell out of here. I'm missing the Jerry Springer Show." (also by Howard Garrett)

"I've prepared for this moment and I'm ready to go. Nurse, bring me my bed pan." (by Cary Antebi)

 

Good captioning, everyone. Be on the lookout for Contest No. 73 -- it'll be showing up real soon.




Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 72


Contest No. 72 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save". Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission.

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions for this contest is midnight Tuesday, September 2, 2014.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your caption.




Physician's Management, 1998





Highlights for Children, 1985





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