Management Accounting, May 1989





Insurance Sales, 1982





Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 123


                                      "Lady, I don't pick the music!"

                                                (by Tim Collins)

 

My original caption: "Eighth floor . . . Complaint Department."

 

A resounding third win for Tim Collins! Congratulations, Tim, you can once again bask in the glory of being one of the funniest people around.

 

Not much action on this particular drawing -- what's happening, captioneers? In any event, these are the other submissions that I was considering for top honors:

"It's not my fault the complaint department is off on Monday!" (by Brendan Gannon)

"I guess I just have a way of pushing peoples buttons!" (also by Tim Collins)

"I still cannot believe they are real." (by Diane)

"Madam, I swear this elevator always gets stuck between floors." (by Rich Wolf)

"I don't choose the elevator music ma'am." (by Segie Tvizer -- a caption that was very close to the winning caption, but Tim Collins got it with slightly better wording)

Thanks for participating -- a new contest will be up in just a couple of weeks.

 




Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 123


Contest No. 123 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save".

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. Also, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest.  This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else's similar spontaneous caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Tuesday, September12, 2017.  

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.




Lion, 1997





Parts Pups, 1981





Personnel Journal, 1987





Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 122


          "We can afford the clothes, it's the vacation that's the problem."

                                             (by John Platt)

 

My original caption: "I need the money for a swimming pool."

 

Another win for John Platt -- it's his fourteenth! Congrats, John, you pulled it off and once again we can proclaim to the world that you are one of the funniest people around.

I feel like I should apologize for my own very lame and tepid original caption. My only excuse is that I dreamed up the gag more than sixty years ago and just kept re-drawing and updating it, hoping against hope that some Cartoon Editor would take pity on me and buy it and publish it. No Cartoon Editor ever did that.

Anyway, many of you came up with some decent captions, and "collateral" seems to have been the key word in quite a few of them (wish I had thought of using that word sixty years ago). Here are the submissions that I was seriously considering for top honors:

"We need a pool, can you take them as collateral?" (by Diane)

"Can I use them as collateral until the Summer ends?" (by Harvey Appelbaum)

"I told them you bought a big bond pool with my retirement account. Now they want in!" (by Brendan Gannon)

"Uh . . . that wasn't exactly the collateral I was thinking." (by Bruce Morgenstern)

"We like to look at things with a pool half-full attitude." (by Rich Wolf)

"Believe me, taking this vacation is an emergency." (by Cary Antebi)

"But DAD, it's for your grandkids!" (by Tim Collins)

"They're following me everywhere waiting for me to say 'Marco' so they can say 'Polo'." (by Marc Eliot Stein)

(The last caption was just too silly for serious consideration, but I'm including it because it made me laugh.)

Thanks for participating, captioneers. A new contest will be up in just a few short weeks.

 




Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 122


Contest No. 122 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save".

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. Also, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest.  This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else's similar spontaneous caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Tuesday, August 22, 2017.  

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.




Florida Bar News, 1996





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